I have discovered something about being sober: I notice The Lord's hand in a lot more that I do. What happens when I am not sober is that I am blind to the help that is offered and given to me by others. I will miss out on the kind words given to me. I loose sight of the accolades that are presented to me. I forget to be thankful for the little, kind deeds that people do for me on a daily basis. I will be so caught up in my own little world of recovery, that I forget that I have to be thankful and notice the world around me. Most of all: I need to make sure I recognize what The Lord is doing for me!
One of the nightmares of a man who is addicted to lust is when girls present themselves with newest fashions is short, low, tight, translucent, and/or otherwise revealing clothing. It is truly very difficult to look away. These are those situations where I have to decide, "Am I going to look or not? Nobody will see me do it. Nobody will know." And then the worst of the rationalization sets in: "The girl dressed that way on their own. I am simply enjoying the pleasures of modern society!" Who am I kidding? Nobody by myself. The Lord knows the intents of the heart. If I accidentally see something, I can write it off as temptation. If I peer into the situation. . . .well, that is a whole other story altogether.
Well, recently I have been doing fairly well with my soberness and found myself recently in the above-mentioned situation. It happened three times within ten minutes (Curse those short skirts above the knee!) Well, as
I only know that had I not been watching for The Lord's hand in it all, I would have never noticed. I thanked The Lord for all he does to help in my recovery. He not only paid for sins, but regularly helps us all in our struggles along the road to recovery. When He helps us, He does not always tell us. I believe He wants us to figure it out on our own, then acknowledge His presence. It only makes sense. How else do I expect to more fully trust in God?
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